NYE

NYE??? Really, New Years Eve, is just too much to write or say?  Why do we always feel the need to shorten things?  Are we trying to make things happen faster, to get things done sooner, to make things seem smaller, less important?  Do we need things that immediate that we shorten it to get it to us faster, so we can move on to the next big thing, that we will try to minimize?  Why can't we just savor things for a bit longer?

I don't have plans for tonight, well not what anyone would call true plans, but I do plan on staying in, snuggling with my hubby, and going to bed early. We don't need to stay up late to see the new year coming in, as a nephew once said; What, this is it, nothing happens at Midnight, no big flash, nor loud noises, or explosions? He was disappointed, and I don't blame him, the first time he gets to stay up on New Years and he learns it is no big deal, same thing as every other night.

I feel sort of melancholy about not having some great plans, but at the same time blessed.  Sure we didn't get a single invite anywhere, and no one is wishes we were there with them, it is okay.  We aren't big social people, we don't have big parties, we don't invite family over often. Maybe it is a good thing, we are sick most of the time, and pretty surly anyway. We would just end up pissing people off, and offending them. We are blessed because we are a married couple that enjoy each others company, love to be together and just want to spend the night with just us, in our safe and warm home.  Which sounds like what a lot of other people are doing this year. We will eat tons of junk, drink plenty of cold soda, and sleep in fresh clean sheets, the sheets depend on me getting off my ass and getting them washed. But this is something I really want to ring in the New Year's with, fresh clean sheets. I love them. 

I have felt pretty good this week, sure the weather has turned extra cold, we have a ton of snow, and I am still in my jammies most days, I am happy.  I haven't felt too down this week, which is surprising for me, the only thing that really got me down is knowing we are approaching a whole new year, a new beginning, a chance to make it all fresh and new, and that can seem daunting, but like this past year, I just need to take it one step at a time.  One day at a time. This new year is going to speed by, because of the birth of my next baby, that always makes time just speed by. Maybe that has added to my new feeling of peace, knowing it is soon over with, I will soon have my baby, and will soon no longer be pregnant. Sometimes we get so wrapped up in the bad things pregnancies brings, we forget to just enjoy it, to feel the baby moving, to find the perfect name, to have all those hopes and dreams you have, while thinking of what your child's life will be like. It is all endless, the possibilities.

Even if it isn't just that, that makes me feel good, I am happy that I had a good emotional week, it is nice to feel normal, and well adjusted. I hope this feeling carries into the next year.