Ok
so here's the deal, and I know this is going to offend some of you, but
that is alright, because offense can always be easily found.
Here I go, even though I am a very opened and honest person, this isn't something I do with ease, because really, it is opening me up for all sorts of judgement, from all sorts of people.
Do you realize what you are saying when you call something "trash, smut, sleazy, and nasty?" You are also implying that those who have taken part of those experiences are "trash, smut, sleazy and nasty,"
I am not in your bedroom, and you are not in mine, which I am sure we are all glad for, but for some reason it is perfectly fine to put on blast your feelings about what may be going on in others relationships. Yes certain movies and books may not be your cup of tea,but we aren't all the same, how boring would that be? I would not judge you for what you enjoy, but it is ok for you to judge others?
Ok, I will stop beating around the bush and I will just come out and say it, I am talking about 50 Shades of Grey, no I am not endorsing it, I am not going to tell you to read it, but I am going to ask that you take a step back, think a moment.
The majority of the readers are mothers over the age of 30.
Mothers over the age of 30.
Instead of beating these women up, making them feel as if they need to hide and be ashamed, why don't we maybe think about why this book resonates with so many. I mean come on, 100 million copies have been sold, and that isn't counting ones borrowed from friends and libraries and read as ebooks.
So please don't act like you don't know anyone who might have read these books. Don't act like you are better than because your sin is different. Do not call these wifes, mothers, friends, neighbors, "trashy, smutty, sleazy and nasty."
Instead take a moment to think about what these ladies might be missing in their lives.
Please don't say, oh they are all closet gold diggers, or they are just dirty old women, wanting some unrealistic fantasy, that they are wanting something that can't be reached and that isn't healthy.
Well to me, maybe they are wanting a connection, maybe they want someone to notice them, to want and desire them? Maybe they feel lost and alone and just wish to feel connected to someone who loves them.
Maybe they need a change in their lives.
No, these aren't diluted females, waiting for their own Christian, these are moms, and I have to assume many of them are married moms. They don't expect handsome men to stop them on the street and offer them helicopter rides.
But they would love a man to kiss them passionately in an elevator, or maybe in the kitchen and who can shame a woman for wanting that?
They want more of a connection, more love.
So when you say, "oh but if this book replaced the sex scenes with diarrhea episodes would you still read it", that is just silly. There is more to these books than sex. Just like if you judge this book, you are judging more than just the author.
So I am asking you to stop the judging and maybe think of ways to help these women connect with their spouses and partners.
I ran across this TEDxCu talk, (after watching one on domestic abuse a cousin posted), and while I watched it, I realized this is what we should be promoting, healthy relationships, rather than shaming others. There is a reason there is a market for these books, why it hits a nerve with so many. Not because of just the sex, (before you attack me for being naive, yes I know some just wanted the sex aspect, but that isn't the only attraction to these stories and even if they just wanted to read the sexy bits, is it your place to judge others?)
So please take the time to watch this video and think about the couples in your life, and how maybe more attention to the loss of sexual connection in relationship would make the world better, instead of tossing hate and judgement around.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ep2MAx95m20
Here I go, even though I am a very opened and honest person, this isn't something I do with ease, because really, it is opening me up for all sorts of judgement, from all sorts of people.
Do you realize what you are saying when you call something "trash, smut, sleazy, and nasty?" You are also implying that those who have taken part of those experiences are "trash, smut, sleazy and nasty,"
I am not in your bedroom, and you are not in mine, which I am sure we are all glad for, but for some reason it is perfectly fine to put on blast your feelings about what may be going on in others relationships. Yes certain movies and books may not be your cup of tea,but we aren't all the same, how boring would that be? I would not judge you for what you enjoy, but it is ok for you to judge others?
Ok, I will stop beating around the bush and I will just come out and say it, I am talking about 50 Shades of Grey, no I am not endorsing it, I am not going to tell you to read it, but I am going to ask that you take a step back, think a moment.
The majority of the readers are mothers over the age of 30.
Mothers over the age of 30.
Instead of beating these women up, making them feel as if they need to hide and be ashamed, why don't we maybe think about why this book resonates with so many. I mean come on, 100 million copies have been sold, and that isn't counting ones borrowed from friends and libraries and read as ebooks.
So please don't act like you don't know anyone who might have read these books. Don't act like you are better than because your sin is different. Do not call these wifes, mothers, friends, neighbors, "trashy, smutty, sleazy and nasty."
Instead take a moment to think about what these ladies might be missing in their lives.
Please don't say, oh they are all closet gold diggers, or they are just dirty old women, wanting some unrealistic fantasy, that they are wanting something that can't be reached and that isn't healthy.
Well to me, maybe they are wanting a connection, maybe they want someone to notice them, to want and desire them? Maybe they feel lost and alone and just wish to feel connected to someone who loves them.
Maybe they need a change in their lives.
No, these aren't diluted females, waiting for their own Christian, these are moms, and I have to assume many of them are married moms. They don't expect handsome men to stop them on the street and offer them helicopter rides.
But they would love a man to kiss them passionately in an elevator, or maybe in the kitchen and who can shame a woman for wanting that?
They want more of a connection, more love.
So when you say, "oh but if this book replaced the sex scenes with diarrhea episodes would you still read it", that is just silly. There is more to these books than sex. Just like if you judge this book, you are judging more than just the author.
So I am asking you to stop the judging and maybe think of ways to help these women connect with their spouses and partners.
I ran across this TEDxCu talk, (after watching one on domestic abuse a cousin posted), and while I watched it, I realized this is what we should be promoting, healthy relationships, rather than shaming others. There is a reason there is a market for these books, why it hits a nerve with so many. Not because of just the sex, (before you attack me for being naive, yes I know some just wanted the sex aspect, but that isn't the only attraction to these stories and even if they just wanted to read the sexy bits, is it your place to judge others?)
So please take the time to watch this video and think about the couples in your life, and how maybe more attention to the loss of sexual connection in relationship would make the world better, instead of tossing hate and judgement around.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ep2MAx95m20
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